Anxious
Sarah Reeves
Throw the covers over my head
Finding comfort in my own bed
Staring at a screen light,
Looking at the highlights, everybody’s good life
Reminding me of what I don’t have
Second guessing who I really am
Maybe I should give up,
Will I ever measure up, I don’t think I’m good enough
Pressure building, body shaking
I can’t take it, I can’t take it
Feel the tension, pushing pulling
I can’t fight it, I can’t fight it
I don’t wanna live my life like this
Anxious
I gotta lot of good in me to give
But I’m anxious
So many things I know I miss
Cause I’m anxious
I wish I could shake this
I don’t wanna be anxious
Devil’s running around my mind
Why do I let myself believe the lies
It’s like I’m his playground,
Push me in the background, and I shut the world out
Oh oh oh
This is my confession
Oh oh oh
I’m coming out of hiding
Can’t keep living like this, living like this
Oh oh oh
I’m coming out, I’m coming out
I’m coming out of hiding
Cause I don’t wanna live my life like this
Songwriters: Sarah Reeves / Lucas Bradley Arens
Anxious lyrics © Downtown Dlj Songs, Pfmh Song Club
Anxiety seems to be all around us. Before the coronavirus it seemed like so many people I know were dealing with anxiety. And this pandemic hasn’t helped!
I’m not sure why anxiety is so much a thing in normal life. Maybe we get more news that is designed to make us feel like the world is falling apart. Maybe it’s we’ve been raised to see the world as out to get us…
There’s a definition of anxiety… Anxiety is fear of the future.
Fear is powerful. It can push out hope. It can push out love. It makes us hoard toilet paper and it can lead us to push people away.
Some people would probably argue with me on this, but I think Jesus dealt with anxiety. The night before Jesus was murdered, He prayed… Prayed is too tame a word. He was begging His Father to not make Him go through the beatings, the insults, being stripped naked… He pleaded to not go through separation from His Father. He begged to not hang on a wooden contraption that was designed to suffocate the breath out of Him.
Luke 22: 41 He walked away, about a stone’s throw, and knelt down and prayed, 42 “Father, if you are willing, please take this cup of suffering away from me. Yet I want your will to be done, not mine.” 43 Then an angel from heaven appeared and strengthened him. 44 He prayed more fervently, and he was in such agony of spirit that his sweat fell to the ground like great drops of blood. (NLT)
That looks like terrible anxiety.
Here’s what I see in this story of Jesus facing the fear of the future:
1. He didn’t fight it. He didn’t act like it didn’t exist. He walked into that fear.
2. He had supporters around Him. His friends bailed, so God sent an angel. Look for the angels around us that support us. I’ve got a friend, Dennis. He’s one of those guys who has been in my corner and has been me with in hard times.
3. In the end, He let His Father lead. Matthew 26:42 ““My Father! If this cup cannot be taken away unless I drink it, your will be done.” There is so much peace is letting go of control.
I’d love to hear your experience with anxiety. How do you get through it? How does it feel for you?